I have just finished watching one of the episodes of Grey's Anatomy. My sister and I have always enjoyed the TV show because of the storytelling and characters.

One main key point of today's episode was that according to Meredith's shrink: there will always be horrible things happening around us. We will have horrible feelings, emotions and thoughts triggered by certain events, people or whatever, but the point is to know that this horribleness cannot obliterate us. The feelings we have, the crazy scary negative feelings are not enough to kill us. We have the capacity to move on.

The stuff she said has gotten me in a state of reflection. We feel angry when things do not go our way. We feel all sorts of feelings. We just feel. These feelings go away. We're still here after all these energy-draining emotions pass.

I feel that sometimes I get this dreadful feeling when I do not know what else I must feel anymore. I don't know. It is just that I try to understand certain characters in my life. But, it does not matter. Once I try, I should not have to feel bad, but at times I do. Most times, I just feel tired, tired of having to explain, to justify certain things, for it to get pushed back into my face again.

But hey, it's taken me a long way to reach this point. So what if I falter. I must not let people pull me down. I have a choice to be there for myself instead of dragging my feet like a zombie because I get easily 'affected' by other people's crazy dramas.

shanaz@RS | 2:23 AM | Labels: